he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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