what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize