Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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