Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize