Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
