Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize