The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
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