So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
