:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
