I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize