Too much gin, very little bucket
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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