Will you blow on my dice?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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