return my video game
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
