the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
