i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
