arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Randomize
