conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize