fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
