Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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