walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
