i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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