I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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