i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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