your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
