I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
