I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I wish life had little blips of pornography
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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