Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
North Korea, Best Korea!
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
