from now on my penis is your penis
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
