What did we do last night that was yellow?
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
