After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
