Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
