I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
