It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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