Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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