she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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