I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
