Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
