Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
