why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Just high enough for therapy.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
