I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
