I wish I could punch you in the face.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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