Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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