ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize