Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
how drunk are you?
Several
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
