There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Randomize
