It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
