As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
