I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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