I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
