How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
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