He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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