somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
you guys were way drunker than both of me
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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