Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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